Topic, Facts about Chuck Norris

  because of the relativity theory you would die from punching him

  If you punch chuck norris, he will crush you!

  RUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

  Chuck Norris is uber super-hyper cool then

  oh no! Chuck hates people stating the obvious! RUN SUPERDOG!!!

  Chuck Norris is cool

  Chuck Norris' keyboard doesn't abbreviate Control into Ctrl or Print Screen into PrtSc.
It also doesn't have an Escape key, it has a Kill key.
[edit] also, when Chuck presses the Tab key his PC gives him a cigar!
[re-edit] if Chuck Norris ever searches a command in google(such as "Blow up neighbour with grenades") it will happen...eventually...unfortunately yesterday he searched "Turn Earth into uninhabitable wasteland"

  Chuck Norris has a computer with a "RhKck" button. It stands for Roundhouse Kick

  if Chuck Norris plays trivial pursuit, he always wins, as anything he says becomes true

  Chuck Norris doesnt go the Toilet, he finshed that years ago.

  That's the same as your other one, except you changed foolish into stupid

  Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack... his heart isn't stupid enough to attack him.

  Chuck Norris only dies when hes dead, and thats along way away.

  That reminds me...

Chuck Norris can light fire underwater.

  Chuck norris can burn fire and set water on fire.

  Chuck Norris can pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars,

  Chuck Norris to you too!

  Chuck Norris removed that message.

  Chuck Norris. no more needs saying.

  Chuck Norris doesn't drink water. He finds it too boring.
Instead he swallows 1 ton of hydrogen that transmits in water inside his body duo of the degree of oxygen and the heat inside of him.

  Chuck Norris will never have a heart attack... His heart isn't foolish enough to attack him.

  Who lives in a pineapple under the sea...

CH-U-CK NOR-RIS!

  NORRIS ONSLAUGHT!!! >:D

-He who laughs last, laughs best. He who laughs at Chuck Norris, it's certainly HIS last laugh.

-The term 'Dead Ringer' is used to describe a person that sits next to Chuck Norris at the movies and forgets to turn off his cell phone.

-On the seventh day, God rested... and Chuck Norris took over.

-The term cowBOY is used because Chuck Norris is the only one qualified to be a cowMAN.

-Chuck Norris lost both of his legs in a car accident, yet was still able to walk it off.

-For Chuck Norris, every street is one way. His way.

-Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin he built with his own hands.

-As President Roosevelt said, "We have nothing to fear but fear itself". And fear has nothing to fear but Chuck Norris.

-When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it affects the world economy.

-Chuck Norris never won any awards for acting in his action movies... that's because he's not acting.

-Chuck Norris's pulse is measured on the richter scale

-Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

-One of the things Chuck Norris won't roundhouse kick is time... unless it tries to tell him what time it is.

-America isn't a democracy. It's a Chucktatorship.

-To get rid of old pennies, Chuck Norris stretches them into 5 dollar bills... Lincoln is on both, anyway.

-Dynamite was originally invented by Chuck Norris as a way to cure his indegestion.

  HE DID IT AGAIN!

WALDO IS SCARED OF CHUCK NORRIS!

  Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding. :p

  French fries were just supposed to be fries, but at the time of their creation, Chuck Norris liked France. :P

  When Chuck Norris calls for an admin, the text becomes capitalized

  Chuck Norris Called an Admin!

  When Bruce Banner gets angry, he turns into The Hulk. When The Hulk gets angry, he turns into Chuck Norris.

  The cook in ratatouille did prison because he had secret affairs with Chuck Norris, the proof: he can kill someoen with his thumb.